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Funny News Stories 3-30-12

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Mentioned in this Audio:

  1. Kenny Rogers8:30
  2. Barbara Bush6:17
  3. George Herbert Walker Bush6:36
  4. Mega Millions0:40, 2:09
  5. Domino's Pizza2:31
  6. BP7:09
  7. Kevin Love5:55
  8. Megan Fox1:16
  9. Megan Smith0:50
  10. Tip O'Neill10:07

Fri, 30 Mar 2012|

Barbara Bush makes George H.W. Bush sing “The Gambler” (Kevin as Bush) and A Domino’s Pizza employee is busted for selling pot (Kevin as Pat Robertson)

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Automatically Generated Transcript (may not be 100% accurate)

Countdown is on for the 540. Million dollars to nine million millions is that this is still up by forty record. It's at 548 as a record -- -- -- option of 26 annual payments of nineteen plus million dollars or a lot of them 309 million which works out to be about 273. Million. After taxes. Now it went up 64 million yesterday oh yeah alone so I'll. Zoom that yeah yeah they make up a hundred million so. By the time this thing resolved on -- use the winner or winners may be looking at. A 64600. Million dollars brilliantly colored dubbed Mega Millions -- hit us and everybody if I got that much did you build an elevator -- for your cars out there. I don't -- and college Megan Megan Smith in the a lot of people -- should wanna be a mega millionaire you know you going to be a mega millionaire. So for combat like yeah. Quit democrats' domestic nowhere jobs you have Tony. Maybe they need to do admit would do. And by the company. And then fire every one that's and they hold -- today. I -- firing. You could clone Megan Fox a billion times news. Or you could get -- and let us spaz new eyes. I can't I even after that. You still have cash to spare both mind and you wouldn't care. And that's what would happen. If you were a mega millionaire. And you don't have to scratch those things it is -- -- that -- giving -- a question techno malware isn't like next dollars like there. I need that money so get out he got a note that now because nobody wins I'm not seven I'll tell you can get to a billion somebody always used to illustrate this Ron Paul's new campaign slogan. -- couldn't pronounce. The he says don't count amount of the campaign -- -- no he just he destruct in Europe and columnist and -- ball. They're more optimistic. It's been -- -- first sort as Mega Millions. You could put -- does that mean insisted that incentive to cut my shrubbery. Central American and Palestinian house. That is the tough economy Greg people are often multitasking at their jobs and your delivery person it would make sense he tried it. -- -- something to what you're doing. So was the case in Clarksville Indiana a Domino's Pizza employee. Is accused of offering pots and while she was delivering pizza -- -- a police say air apple claims was arrested and charged with selling marijuana my seven year old woman now with the driver. -- -- -- -- rooms 17030 -- it -- frequently happens that he's been recently tried unload pot to an undercover police officer books lose them. -- -- On one yes we do it the Clarksville police detective Jeff Kennedy yet. It is described as being a majority you know marijuana she was doing a while she -- on dating. There you know let them pizza. -- was kind of a front for her activity outside America our actual. Undercover detective that set up surveillance on the doesn't there and he -- -- pull down. And that's when he approached her and identified himself he asked him point blank you know she was aware Manning. Marijuana being on the premise us and she. Basically. So are pulling out -- -- time. She had four. Small guy he's containing the Green leafy substance. -- believe in marijuana. Those were individually packaged herself Don knows this point has no involvement in them there's. No connection between the two you know there's no reason individually -- your own. Personal use. -- and got the cops that the eighteen at large extra -- it's in order before they got this -- should portion I think what it was shooting at creative you know Russian media award of the rate name for the -- that marijuana -- to thirty Pepsi -- -- has asked. And vote. On its. Stone Pat Robertson -- assistant. And yeah. Robinson right -- the -- and you -- have been cool to have been content. But this new bit better to. This. Development I -- not have been better. -- open up. And -- about a repeat. -- been eight minutes or not there another bat and had. That Mercury car -- of our troops and it did as -- as Oprah and news of the man. Yeah yeah. And in just under an hour that kept oregano love their kids and and man. Is there any programs. And debated. That I was actually. The -- -- and of that I didn't know. A well yeah. And play the game man up and read. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- Man and on. Sunday and never thought about what lab of the noise. He has made it Kevin Love it did not blow and now -- Yeah yeah dignity and you mean yeah. And there's. An. That's cool out of the elder bush has endorsed Mitt Romney Craig yes. Barbara Bush says that other Republicans should drop out of the -- Yeah. So there have been some rumors floating around that 41. A great man. Is suffering from dementia just like Weston. And that that's the reason why you don't see George Herbert Walker Bush much in public anymore. So where he showed up yesterday. Amy around I'm mildly elevated not me now and unfortunately. Com Barbara. I think was treating him like he was -- two year old kid which says to me that he probably has. -- abdomen just like I agonized issue except like a -- years that he served the country and wasn't around so she and I just think maybe the guy maybe she's helping him because he's an older guy and -- if BP is suffering through I don't know -- the issue that she's this inmate but -- and hopefully we have booster every guy that me when you think this guy right I think about on the powerful man yeah you know -- -- ahead of one of the most powerful theme he's -- in the world right. And then you roll them out now and you do what we're about it and you do this to appoint an the guys seen how this is an awful largely on the farm at the center. -- closet door and it. Sounded okay please be and endorsement offers so he's endorsing Mitt Romney. And he sounds okay. When he's doing now. Harvard are very proud to. Fully and enthusiastically. Endorse and endorse and support our old friend Mitt Romney. I -- good man. He'll make a great president. And we just wish him well. A little sketchy but I mean that the -- caught in -- hole and that whistle -- -- -- it's still well below Ivory Coast. National the company but that Barbara. Just makes him look like I mean it's a former presidents can we will beat you can't make these people look like the foods like gears of Barbara. Bush. Jesus himself or you know -- to open it up felt. I do think it's time for her. Parties get behind him. And you're reminded me Kenny Rogers today as time went Olbermann time to vote but they it is time for people that all get behind. This good man. Line. The missing us on -- opposite. -- You believe that I feel awful lot to do that I'd like I don't know that people aren't gonna sing a -- He admits people came up with -- like iPod. That's gonna do other pot like all people they're probably talking about hey it's time baffle them -- That he could mean it's I mean a bit impressed that he sang it UB actually -- the -- But it's that it just goes oh yeah. You got to know in Cuba a -- says dementia it's the reason he's endorsing Romney. That's as -- out. Good point this is. George Herbert yes sir yes that means. Like yeah. I wanna assure everyone that I'm completely. The ground so I'm mental faculties. At one to get behind. And good friend -- and I've. Met and he had. Well you know this but if you had not -- My bracket and now. What people think and I don't know what I'm talking about it in that's embarrassing act. On the -- this morning tiptoe in. The issue is that. There are. But Tip O'Neill has passed. It's it's tough when you Google on your friends. And so yes hi you know I should never covered up -- well. And it's good news. That CIA and trying to in my department. And -- This board and -- -- on the lottery pick and -- it's like a great program would break. Yes you know it's like to hear Roger wants added that you know young man. Does not need to. I said -- man. -- -- the ground. You know and here yeah and there's no need to playing. Time. Well well well that night in the boxes. That the and at the village I meant as. I mean between Iraq as we -- about it I may there. Snapped back to reality. I don't gravity of the old -- garbage -- these are. I -- -- -- that -- you know. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- And there. All right listen. Those attacks or wants and all of Barbara choose your breakfast and it's good to get them now. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- And geographic channel I don't know why. That that Asia is that what you're right on man. Yeah. There's another. -- -- -- -- -- Here's another Texan says you better behavior barbour's gonna vote you out. It's really kind of program that. I don't. Could go.

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