With us this morning we'll -- Michael Williams Canadians -- comedian. Actor actor and Colorado is a -- I am an Oscar Colorado a guy. Thank you all around it's been quite some time. That's that's quite some time absence while the world was created since you're here and seeing the line now I do apologize. So all right -- had a very very story and -- okay and know that you were busy making. Employee of the month. -- out and a bachelor party. To yes. While analysis pattern applause let whoever else the robinsons made the round Robin the spotlight from ruins which comes in September I haven't heard about it. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- The bill Richard drive as a crutch the allowing being cast as crotchety and box on the iPhone moves it was a bus driver. It's not a big. It's starring Greece is is guys calculate that Tom Cruise of garrido -- I mean the Tom cruises the he's the only topic I think basically -- the -- -- surprised. By Simon Netflix -- is awesome -- -- you saw the treatment on an -- -- business Wednesday -- I can't even pronounce his name but -- -- some big popular guy agrees then. So I don't they know you're. No -- -- -- don't you know money of those queried was the uses fuzzy foreigner no interest than anybody -- from very only into my friend and in himself yeah Marty's idea now but that's okay I would you -- -- you lose that -- American -- The did you -- in the new Rambo movie I have not -- -- the news guys yeah. You like Rambo I do. Here you got it going about it. If they give us government you program this is an expense of time of the year for me why. Well it's allergy season Bryant so do you get allergies I do passes travel with -- -- but only because. You when you get the allergies you sneeze and all the time and ever is sizzling bless you you know. As -- screw you your out of trees you know bless me gas and analyze my grandfather drove around with the father -- the and every time niceties he's right there's -- pressure by -- he gives you special. -- Irish and Irish father McCurry he but I gotta pay for this -- plane ticket. He sleeps at the end of my bed. Every time place daisy pops up pressure right -- those. Six best of tag and a priest thought you go now you have got to priest propp now ours as well. Perhaps as he has done and it's gonna says John -- Or geologist Glassman -- off on minds McRae the then I -- -- at -- we're. Beth gets a lot of spiritual advice from father John you do -- -- The you know with them having a bad day ask my. What would Christ immunity tell me how to handle situations how to come down to traffic -- -- to freak out from. Running around the halls -- yelling and screaming -- column. Now. That's weakest Christ is number have been trapped in traffic -- And I don't know hours to a big lines -- trying to get into the synagogues and yet do we outside of the synagogue it's kind of that's what I'm -- what's that. -- it was held up pulled across to people in the -- us through this never guess he rose bumpers stickers in Hong if you love Jesus yes. That tells I don't know if I. Lose -- because localities and I'll make some noise pollution. I thought about content elbow homeless person and I Jesus I always in my neighborhood I credit -- -- Most of visa through Leo. -- These -- border area. Hey you know what they're very obscure rappers that talk careers and create a key gimmicky. -- -- The talkers. Content on the movie your suitcase I don't know did did you. -- it and my child. So other than the films what it what -- you doing and women in addition Monte my new dvds special yeah last week it's called child while the will be out in the all of them like an Angel does gets -- -- -- That'll be -- fall child lisle and all the stores to wal marts never going to Wal-Mart and yes they do. -- I don't I'm going there every by Rambo films no. Yes and so Rambo. It probably gone on and nuanced if you've been there done. It's available online in the you know would that Wal-Mart in Canada. They do yeah I do I go to Wal-Mart you do it's hard to shoplift there is the -- of yeah. I -- I noticed silica. A pool. It's tough to get under your code that he -- -- go back David Diehl the water likely gutless isn't jugs of water and a art shop look -- rule. Our. Economy that's. All of the pronunciation. That you call -- Wal-Mart but it's really pronounced move all -- and that are independents that Allen Shia. Wal-Mart. Now a move. Cool. I don't know how are you I don't know UH UH gauge shell -- hard clone market could mean you don't give them down here from down. Ball. Well Olympic sounds like doctor -- -- -- my shirt or Ted Baxter business boom boom boom and. That's like saying -- charities say five by June the active that you're doing wrong it's pronounced. Food. -- I didn't never knew that. Man obviously and obviously -- I'd like some chocolate. Ladies and all last time I visited -- opponent talked Lenovo birds remember. I don't. Well we thank you know and I'm Natalie announced that somehow we started target of birds and people are phony you'd been trying to stump me you know bird probably asked if you should do that again. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- Under the first layer the Earth's crust for worms. And nobody wanted to -- was that it would -- ever heard -- make a damn noise. -- advanced ships through arms -- not a -- that's how I -- -- -- analyzer. Is Robbins -- around in my laundry list of firms silent warms under the first -- the Earth's crust and here's the real kicker Robbins don't have ears for god they don't -- ever seen here -- rather -- you what made you think that they're listening. I mean the other's heads are likable guy and I. I had already pulled arm out of our I think it's don't they wait I that they waited too little and came out. No they don't alarms don't come out of the can -- -- -- how do you think the they jump around and think the thumping of their feet makes the -- come to the surface probably had a hat Google worm -- -- can hear rob and there. They want to thank worms are stupid irresponsible if I. I always the first one because that are really being on the waiting to phrase early bird gets the arm comes up that says this action. Yeah in -- -- veterans are saying yeah my dad taught me now. Not the early bird gets the alarm. I don't yet laid your -- -- and Mauritania. -- make you never heard. He stayed. The yeah I know yes. Yes. But the a question and don't -- What the only other train wreck in turn it ought. The only bird of -- that can turn its flaws. Rotate there are no -- their claws. On this one of the rules on. It's the African trends former law. Cool. Clothes we ought spray oh yes the osprey I really do you know that's the I'm. Oh you are your bird -- what does that mean when you -- -- -- guy. Ornithologist. Really. Me eight they aren't finished in the carrier -- at first so they aerodynamic. Is this. Or born in the colleges James that Simpson -- -- -- Yeah any other bird questions. Immediately stop it right now kind of movement like -- -- -- like that -- that'll be anything for one. You know it to bird is native to New Jersey. -- -- the -- -- Bon Jovi. -- You did it. Happy it did if you think. With it is a political Donna act it. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- Yes. Buys you warm with the years Bravo. All. Yeah. -- professional. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- that there were things that guy throws you for can be elected new swear word that. A bird for a national and I. Looked like the news the news Limbaugh and today. -- David. -- -- -- -- KP on the bird -- BA BA by the way Harlan is that the comic action this evening. Balloon over SI guess all -- Xbox Live -- the good spot -- national China Chinese failure like Chinese full audits. Mario little story for you wouldn't. Army continues to be and yeah. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- Friday and Saturday nights at the comedy connection -- annual hall please call the following number 617248. And 700. To go see -- -- Yes your story -- you ever been down to Chinatown. Yes. This is true on -- ago you look announcement like I'm knocked on your views and interest thing. Statistic -- I think everything you say is totally true closes I was down there yesterday and never would speak in Chinese all over the place and you speak Chinese new I don't I don't know what their science so the zone I figured out. You know if you shake a Chinese person really hard for thirty seconds they speak perfect English couple until they. It can the like channahon. The first words out of the mountain lake wideout you shake it under the yeah. While. Historically it's gravel -- story I don't know I paid shock. Yeah out of their quiet they'll call -- You know knowing that that's the -- Roger himself. Yes that's as a bird watcher. As bad as always said the Ted Williams and Williams was there adviser bird watchers have some great they're great -- psych degree Major League because most like to look at guys pieces in the show out headlines throughout the smallest -- is a lot. You. That's the smallest extra you know evidence. That's probably the Honeybee hummingbird. -- Little tiny. Room Ingraham wasteful to fly it like a thousand miles an -- there you go pressure march. Thank you -- needs of -- visit. It's like the -- To a tiny Tim's whose act it jumped over the candles that are just Google it's extra. I at a -- that I guy on the phone like that bird could swoop down and Kerry did. Tiny Tim Moyer whatever is now I forget where your vast knowledge of birds came from forgive me. I was raised by -- a family of Byrd's office. Yeah yeah yeah I. I'm really amazed by -- spread out now what happened obviously you're a baby I was swimming unity and the -- spray I -- this Tokyo little claws. Clamped around you dragged to the -- I'm assuming that masks and raised with the other Australia as well as well he pleaded with the audience. It's rather in this area -- -- -- Carolina's Brandan raise as if you are not spread yes. -- -- Must behind to win regular into. Lines now and -- -- and to do and do speak. In thing only it's pretty obvious you denominated in I'm not gonna starve to death yeah I'm going to be even as late. -- that that I got that. -- had heard it hit. I got a lot of handled as -- here I thought it now now the question -- mission now. Then what's your favorite -- here we are going on and on around and serve -- yeah. I guess I like the bald eagle nothing. The -- love symbol of our country well it's changed now you see the ball deals flying around with hair plugs. -- and it's an -- looks how is the book is these is the bald -- still a endangered species. Yes yes systems and can buy that it was taken off -- those taken off to another to. They're doing better but that the you know doing better in sanctuaries. Nowadays they're they're they're they're more more Eagles are finding mates and -- having. Offspring. Obama all while political offspring. Again it is -- babies. Mean you don't see that down at the park on Sunday now from appear beautiful kid -- my office. You can. Yeah. Our forward from my office crying at the factory -- gaggle -- mechanical problem. Office for a speaking of that how. I'll hold you now. Forties and you've -- all global oil to be on trial well I mean -- Now you know kids right no well in on some eggs. Yeah I'll bring -- officer -- I mean as you get older that -- -- 45. That he's 45 gown the ever have. The yearning to have a child have a young Harland Williams and -- do you know let's see if we can get -- made some. I wasted energy Spitzer and -- on the line and I give me some -- a -- An obscure reference yes. -- -- -- -- -- Okay figures of the road game I ask and answer our own. Lives so. Stuck with that today Imus specimens. Using them men's room game -- from while in the wallets they're gonna work. Oh what's it's posted grow there if he had yeah as the and then head to Atlanta but -- the pro here I think it down it's not as India and -- exist and how she keeping a majority have asked -- and it and some cases it programs have you tried dead just -- and was that the -- Now it's it's. It's a club downtown. All of yeah definitely it's like I. Did you know there you -- into the path. With us. You'll everywhere and avoid a bald head and inappropriate content and a lot at. Let's get a check on the one lady you'll get it so again it's a chip and it's very what are. What we're looking for. I don't know what qualities the qualities -- -- -- with a beat. I don't what -- you before he seriously what's what's your perfect unity your ideal woman non elect of the fact girls went about last bureau this is for one now with a girl relief and this girl I'd stretch marks. On her fridge. -- But to give Harlem the voicemail. Could get -- phone number. So what would you like him I mean what's the age with the -- and finally. 28 to make. 33. Okay. About wanna breeder and -- him a figure that's the creator and I doubt breeding hips pot gorges bank agreed with that would dig him -- line for an act -- -- flagrantly Korea says there lines long. Analogue. We'll. -- -- -- -- Leo it just for. That. I bitterness that instrument and honestly if that's what happens here yeah that's -- and the day. Good morning Greg our audio. They can now be welcome whereas that's why -- -- to other to help. Not a I could I would never do that is diligently and -- my man you married and he. A couple of times problems. On you don't be story time. I decide fail miserably -- husbandry. All the it's not their fault it's it's tough -- is a tough to. What's the toughest part of the married would you say. -- Not being able to yeah. I always get away it could yet. That's you know you can hang out of the strippers realized you you know -- monster prim and you have to go -- -- to be a moment like salmon what do you Marius stripper though. Yeah but that's kind of tough isn't. I mean I'm surprised having you have you now at this point done two films with Jessica Simpson. One she was and you via instant quote she wasn't in the Dukes of Hazzard prequel who has known now. Another girl who was that lizard was. Us yet and April's dot peoples dot she was one of the Deal or No Deal -- a -- us now. As you -- -- to these dudes actually I turned into that guy how Lehman Dell and when when you you know as I travel. Yeah I gotta go through that stupid X ray screener at the airport management and it's a pain and yes I just wanna get to my terminal in -- really fast they hate the -- through that extra. And I caramel little travel case out of gold throw. And ladies like sir I got open your case. I look at her name tag and I'm like should -- Williams. I'll give you twenty dollars. Not open my okay. I Deal. Or No Deal on the path as it goes sir I got open your case and -- like should be Coelho and open the case I. -- -- Here's what I do I leave my dirty underwear my current she Sox right on top -- believes the case and his lawyer argued should be. You dismayed -- -- yeah. The most -- just freak out at. -- and loads it into a community really. -- yeah. 2000 and analogue just never fly up to the top of GM metal detector and hundred talents like like threatening people with you now and I can't believe you're making phone my narrative now that I'm. Hearing this is okay and certainly I don't nutritional profile I will throw to a commercial like that if you're trying to. I wrote to a commercial where your car dealerships. -- out your local carpet Syria. You don't know -- I hate your grass I'll throw to a commercial player. Lead back. Leave that player. We don't ask Louisiana role player we don't have anything you know I have any ladies free yet so he leaves his view on if you like to audition. For Harland he's here Hala to a -- -- he's here for the weekend obviously -- like to be shop Sean around. Little doll culture owner I'd just I'd need to get to breed breathing he's -- -- -- that. I don't want a briefing in order can now I don't wanna see. The -- is Burt Reynolds moving on its Maria -- just creating his -- out how does. Vermont and lay down now we're gonna braid. It's nothing wrong whether it's a natural. Animal. Function. And mentally. We have to breathe and eat. Mountain time we're gonna go get them honest to god and what we do you must -- somebody -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- well I thought I'd be -- across the -- I -- furry -- -- India and go back and forth like regret it when you revert to -- form to -- -- form there to give -- a car for commercial. -- yeah it clear about this guy's walking on the wire Allen Danny. -- I ask mom there yeah that's when I ask him what it was like where. With it was like with the I'll spell. It like what what what what we're quantum. Appropriately. Dave is actually. He's a bit of a quiet guy he's a little bit into respective these. He's one of these guys are very very nice guy he's a smart guy. He's not a guy you can get through to that easily -- a little bit. You know crowds who looks like the wheels are always turn on month. Very very nice nice lad. -- like -- a lot. I got so we do work say oh it's. Yeah and the place where they. X. Spoke salute to upon I'm sure data via CD does yet I don't know Pete does anymore it's gonna. The aids beleaguered body actually lives on a farm with a wife and his kids and he got out of Hollywood right and easily Ohio somewhere kind of arm. That's. I don't know what kind of farm but that's -- while people are a little since -- because they can't imagine giving up you know. The money. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- In Ohio if you're a -- -- -- hello Steve. I know much I want few. So classic that we -- the other day down periscope killed easier. An equally. And like god I want well like outward it would. On -- -- on all men and Unicode. Yeah she's exactly who go bad is spell loser here there's an a on the news and I who got now. I yeah Lauren was. Or it was pretty cool seat that was rated the time she was dating Jim Carrey's own. When we were -- them movie Jim would show up but the set now now and -- -- visit and launch into like a member of the wacky funny voices and be a -- was that that was the most subdued and overseer of when he was around her because I. Toured with Jim would Jim's a buddy of mine. And we'd we've hung out quite a bit and whenever user owner who has the most normal I don't perceive don't mean now. Some kind of glad he got away from -- now he's with Jenny McCarthy now isn't -- I'm sure that some pretty wild now. The little jealousy -- -- him and his wild yet that's what I want give me did you wanna Jenny McCarthy right now now. Lookalike. A look -- yeah so we'll go for nine. What's your style elated to sit over there are not saying my I think I I'm interest in John -- is excellent fifties is she available until he's actually don't know the available for anybody. John Daly the golfer yes yes yes he -- Here she's not odd bridges is the story to David -- is is ex wife but came on so that she hooked up with Roger rocket Clemens. Holy smokes. A pack -- it. If she's in -- there it is right there to like to take a look. In fact that Iraq Virginian that -- -- won on new oh now. I but it beats -- off for Florida attack could happen. Make a good -- -- she. No she's not. Not to order form mostly -- went to bigger judds she's issues like the honest tell the earlier the dead this stretch mark of progress in this. She's no she's not I would. With the Tiger Woods' life for for -- pretty much any there we go Tiger Woods -- -- it unit. You like that it's it's nice. -- -- There Arlen negative about employer called Devin. Have. Seven. -- -- -- -- -- Those of weird you know that that came from like align -- The Tivo. And others that the office news. The whose line is your wrath of wired. That -- would sink him you might as well we're he would use depleted by the time. And we'd hit the bird really high end this guy does drive the other before it it is we'd. We'd -- he. -- Out of their way to distract the other guys prominent in the bird and work. Not really -- every -- the first time probably not -- -- -- -- all these years later when president seeing with Ben Stiller and -- -- merit for some reason just popped into -- had. And an asset illness data about -- classic UR Anderson it is it's a classic we're funny how things is of the origin and then it's weird. It's weird how those things happen. You know you see the -- movie. Probably not one not. Brilliant matter -- and Iron Man I don't really don't like the superheroes stuff and I Kevin violates that stuff now -- -- of China Mobile users' favorite superhero. -- Superman. Straight up straight up he can't do it anymore right. There's no phone booths anymore. And I. Answer none other that the only does not in his day they got rid of that because in the last movie he spins so fast and turns in this story jumps to lower religious Austin nominated. He finds he finds -- new place now because I would have. We're figures showed up deceive the world and three pieces of the island yeah yeah -- stop banality do about it security guard. Underneath this three piece that I have of red and blue leotard with a giant ass on. Yeah right -- yards nice glasses free and you do my taxes that's. I -- -- an accountant accused Tuesday of the world over here at the so program and by -- don't follow both agree that there are not -- -- here and also asked. And I -- I'm who knew who play -- double carpet. Commercials and then we'll come back so all right you have to leave it better and I've pretended I was -- might just through through them. Now everybody give you make another reference about my heritage -- of us Brian. I mean and -- now would you like first one of the intends to run out mean there is some more arms for breakfast. Throat could damp carpet commercial right now.